Sound Advice from Mom

 Posted by on 29 January 2005 at 9:54 pm  Funny
Jan 292005

My mother, a very wise woman indeed, send this helpful bit of advice to me a few days ago:

I am passing this on to you because it certainly worked for me and we all could use more calm in our lives. By following the simple advice described on a Dr. Phil show, today I have a much more tranquil and serene feeling about life.

Dr. Phil proclaimed, “The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you’ve started.”

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I had started and had not finished. So, before leaving the house this morning I finished off a bottle of Vodka, the 1/2 gallon of Butter Pecan ice cream, an opened package of Oreos, the remainder of both Prozac and Valium prescriptions, the rest of the Christmas fruitcake, and an open box of decadent chocolates.

You have no idea how good I feel!!!


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