A Very Impolite Joke

 Posted by on 24 May 2009 at 11:01 pm  Funny, Personal
May 242009

I know that this particular topic isn’t supposed to be funny, but I was highly amused:

A man breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds couple in bed. He orders the guy out of the bed and ties him to a chair. While tying the homeowner’s wife to the bed the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up & goes into the bathroom.

While he’s in there, the husband whispers over to his wife: “Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He’s probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn’t seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don’t resist, don’t complain… do what ever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he’ll kill us both. Be strong, honey. I love you!”

His wife responds: “He wasn’t kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me that he’s gay, thinks you’re cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too.”


Folks, that’s all that I have in my blogging queue, and I’m too busy working ten hour days finalizing my dissertation to do anything so frivolous as blog. Seriously, for eight days now, I’ve done nothing but sleep too little, eat on occasion, and edit, write, and edit more. I have a few more days of work. So unless my co-bloggers post something, and I hope they do, NoodleFood will be quiet this upcoming week. Again, do not e-mail me for any reason. I cannot afford the distraction. If you do, you might get a rather impolite response.

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