Last week, the Chicago Tribune published the following story: Man found chained in basement of burning Crystal Lake house

Crystal Lake firefighters rescued a man from the basement of a burning house Tuesday morning, locked to a post with a chain around his neck, officials said. The 55-year-old man later told police he was chained voluntarily and not the victim of a crime, fire officials said in a statement.

Police and fire officials responded to the 1300 block of Dolo Rosa Vista about 7:50 a.m. and found three people outside the building who said there was a man in the basement, according to the release. Rescuers cut the chain, and the man was treated for smoke inhalation at a hospital and released.

Gee, don’t you think that there might be more to that story?!? Where’s Jerry Springer when you need him? Or sheesh, shouldn’t the man have been a prime candidate for psychiatric care? The questions are endless… (Via John Enright’s Rhyme of the Day.)